Cold and memories, old and new

Oct 30

There was much high-fiving on my behalf in the chemo room today.  It is a relief to be on the the treatment my doctor recommends, and — even as I type that — surreal that such a thing could even be in question.  I/We are continuing to work on making contacts and getting advice about what next steps should look like for me.

At the same time, there are always emotions running high: one friend was having a tough day and that is always real and hard, one new friend was there and she’s only twenty-seven years old, and one friend I’ve known since my beginning is nearing eleven years stable.  And then there was also my buddy who always falls asleep and snores loudly — haha!

We found out that my white blood cell count was low, and I need to delay the start of my next round of Ibrance (oral pills) by a day or a few days so that my counts can rebound.  Please pray that my counts rebound by Wednesday when I go in for a CBC check!  While I was in the office today I got my infusion of Herceptin through my port, and my Faslodex shots in my derriere.  I continue to feel relatively good on this combo, so there is much to be grateful for.  With my low white blood cell count, I’m immuno-compromised, so I need to be laying low and limiting exposure to crowds and sick people.  And — of course — I have a sick kid home today, so good luck to me on avoiding the germs.

Halloween is tomorrow, and in true Ohio fashion, the weather is looking less than ideal (COLD, for you non-locals).  I need to write a letter to Ohio about the merit of sixty-degrees-and-sunny weather.  It’s called autumn, Ohio!  I think we’re in our fifth consecutive year of miserable Halloween weather.

Maren is trying out for volleyball teams this week: the January to June season is decided this last week in October/first week in November.  She is driving what she wants to do, so I feel good that she’s goal-setting and chasing on her own.  Tryouts, I have confirmed, stink!  It’s hard to be told you’re not wanted.  I am super proud of my girl and her efforts and attitude.  She found out she didn’t make one team on Saturday morning, two hours before she was leaving for the next tryout.  She was able to get her mental space cleared from the bad news and went on to the next round with a happy heart.  That’s doing the work, my friends.  I’m so super proud of her heart and mental game in this: Brad and I both benefitted from our athletic experiences as part of our development as people, and it is surreal to see our young daughter learning life lessons as she navigates the same.  I could care less about the game: it’s the life lessons I’m enamored with.

Greta is in a wonderful phase with reading: she’s just gained the comprehension, maturity, and patience to complete chapter books, and she read an Ivy and Bean last week from start to finish.  Her mannerisms with her bookmark, carrying the book with her everywhere she goes, and describing the storyline to me are so endearing.  She’s also writing up a storm: I find notes everywhere, and this morning she started dialoguing in her journal about a conflict she’s having at school.  I’m not even sure where she learned that, as I don’t think I’ve made a point to model writing for her in that way.  She is super intuitive though, so I shouldn’t be surprised that she picked it up.  Greta is still young enough that she runs everywhere she goes.  “Put your pajama’s on G!” and she sprints up the stairs.  Every day when she gets off her school bus, she sprints across the neighbor’s yard.  Aaaah, that energy; I love it!

My mom is in Australia right now; she and her siblings did a sendoff for my late grandmother that involved a wineglass, her ashes, and a dam on the family farm.  I’m not exactly sure how it went down, but what it lacked in reverence, they made up for in giggles.  I’m happy for that to be part of our family legacy.  I love that my grandmother and my grandfather always affectionately called each other ‘love’.  “Yes love,” she’d say as she hung the wash on the line.  “Yes love,” he’d say when he went out to the shed.  Yes.  Love. That pretty much sums up their marriage, the way they raised their family, and they way they served.



  1. Praying Jen. Thanks for the update.

  2. Hmmmmm! And look how that wonderful legacy of love lives on!!

  3. Lisa Smith /


  4. ❤️❤️❤️

  5. Marlayne /

    Continued Prayers & Making Memories 🙂 Hugs 🙂

  6. Yes, Love.
    No to illness!

  7. Genora /

    Much Love to you Jen and to your entire family ! Love Always!

  8. Melissa Pizzato /

    I’m hoping the flowering Peace Lily next to me is a sign you’re in for a ‘white Wednesday’ Jen! Bring on a big boost of you white cell count xxx All the best to you and your gorgeous family! Love you all so much, from all your Aussie cousins xoxo