Subconcious

Mar 04

Ladies, you know that towel turban thing you do on your head when you get out of the shower so that your wet hair doesn’t drip all over the place?

I did that this morning.

Subconsciously, I did that towel thing.  For the first time — probably — since March/April of 2012, since that was the last time I had enough hair to be drippy wet.

It was weird.  I froze in the mirror when I saw myself.  I was awash with gratitude.  I feel again that my Jen-self is continuing to pursue normalcy and — even subconsciously — it feels like I am fighting for: strength, health, normal, free, wellness.  It’s manifesting the physical entities of the joy, hope, bravery, peace, love, kindness, courage that I fight for in my mind.  I’m glad I’m consistent!  Doing the hard work: choosing the goodness in every situation pays off in that that’s how I roll.  It’s my go-to, my comfort zone, my resting place.  I’ve trained myself to live this way, and it’s one of the best gifts I’ve given myself.

It was a year ago this week that I finished my last rainbow treatment with a chemo drug (I’ve continued my biological drugs every three weeks since then), and I was bald.  I had NED (No Evidence of Disease) status then, and I pray daily that I will have NED status for a long time to come.

It’s funny how much gratitude I found in my towel turban today.  Gratitude is everywhere.  Call it out, people.  Call it out.

7 comments

  1. Connie /

    This truly makes me smile- keep doing the towel turban!!! Do Today Well

  2. Suzann /

    Wow! You are such an inspiration (and amazing writer)!

  3. Meggie /

    love you!

  4. Jean /

    Love the visual – and the moment of gratitude captured!

  5. I will think of this moment of gratitude tomorrow morning when I wrap my head in a towel turban. <3

  6. Kathi Roth /

    Yippee! It’s something I just take for granted! Tomorrow my shower routine will bring a smile to my face and a prayer to thank God for your NED!!!

  7. peggy /

    I do LOVE how you notice the smallest details of your life and share them with us. It truly helps me refocus! Thanks for that visual. ♥p